Are you living to the fullest? Is your life everything you hoped it would be? Are you growing, changing and adapting to new situations that come your way? Are you unstoppable?
I’ve been on a journey, a life kick of sorts that has me questioning how I’ve lived these last 27 years. As I mull over my life’s history, I can only conclude good or bad it’s in the past. BUT I am willing to take previous lessons and allow them to shape my future.
I grew up in a very religious home. While I don’t hold to the same rigorous beliefs I appreciate biblical teaching. My favorite by far is the parable of the talents. To summarize, the master gives three servants, three different yet equally important “talents”. To one he gives five, to another two and to the final, one. The first two multiply their share making their master proud. The third and more “wicked” of the three, seeing he only has one, chooses to bury his in the ground. When the master returns he becomes enraged and reprimands him (or her) for not using what had been placed in his care. Actually in Matthew’s retelling the guy goes to hell. Luke’s ending is a bit more…softer?
Top 3 Lessons Learned
- The servant with one is no less than those who have more.
- It is each persons duty to work hard and reach their potential.
- Excuses get you no where.
With that in mind, I ask are you unstoppable? Are you taking everything that’s been given to you and doing your best?
Turning the magnifying glass on myself, I see a woman with commitment issues especially when it comes to jobs. My previous post Damn You LinkedIn was inspired by this. I’ve spent my life half ass-ing two things, my work and my passions; hating or loving both or one, life depending. Acknowledging this and realizing my need to change was the result of my relationship with my fiancé and ironically my father. Being in a couple helped me realize I needed to reach my full potential or else I would be short changing my partner. I started with looking at my parent’s to see if this could explain some of my innate fear of job commitment.
My dad never committed to a job for more than a year, two if he really tried. When asked he never raved about how much he enjoyed his work. It was always “just a job” good only to make money and pay the bills. As a kid I thought well if this is how it’s going to be, I’d rather be doing what love than a job I hate. With that in mind I spent most of my early years living overseas, job hopping and seeing (some parts of) the world!
My dad often remarks how similar we are (agreed). In the case of job stability, the apple didn’t fall far from the tree. Like my father, I too changed jobs frequently. I never fully committed to one thing and I always found myself chasing something in the distance. In my dad’s case it was money. In my case the perfect moment when I’d lay down my desk job for an on-screen position. On a rare occassion my dad and I talked about the chase. “There has to be more to life than this,” he said. I understood. I too felt the really, this is it? I’m going to be working at this forever moment when it came to jobs.
Before I met Alex I was comfortable jumping from one thing to the next without much thought. Now that I am a part of something that includes two moving parts, I’m rethinking things. Even my parents have noticed a change “We don’t know how you got her to settle down,” they once commented. “She must really be in love.” I’ve had a lot of adventures in my life (with more to come) and I’m proud of every one of them. I am however ready for a career adventure and have decided to commit to finding something I love and sticking with it.
So…why is having a career soooo important to me?
- My mother is a homemaker.
- My father’s career is “store manager”?
- My only sibling doesn’t work…neither does her spouse.
Then there’s me…
- First in my family with a college degree
- First in my family to travel within US and Internationally
- First in my family to be a published author
- First in my family to be on television
- AND well… I am too ambitious to just waste away barely living.
I enjoy working and taking my skills and putting them to use. I agree with my dad there has to be more to life than this and I’m on a mission to find it.
Rhonda’s Steps to Career Success
- My first goal was to decide where I stood with acting. Last year I auditioned for my dream school The Actors Studio at Pace. I flew to New York on a 7 AM flight and by the time I left at 7 PM, I’d been offered admission. I never went back and my admission went unclaimed. I mourned this death for months. There are 101 reasons why I couldn’t say yes to the dream: the price tag, fear of failure, fear of leaving Alex. I concluded that if I couldn’t commit 100% then it was time to move on. Yes, after a long struggle I placed acting in the hobby category.
- My second goal was to accept and appreciate my other talents. For the longest time, I didn’t know who I was if I wasn’t acting. When asked what are you good at, I always struggled to find an answer. Honestly I never thought about it. Perhaps this is why I never put effort into finding a job that fit me. Growing up the advice I was given was if it pays well, do it. With that in mind, I went from one job to the next never asking myself is this the kind of job I could stick with.
- My final goal was to accept change. For years I have been clinging to the idea that I would be an actor. Moving it to the hobby section, I was now left with the now what? Seriously what do I do now?
It was a typical weekday night. Alex was cooking shrimp curry. I watched as he floated effortlessly throughout the kitchen. Some where in the space between roasting Brussels sprouts and the sautéing the shrimp I asked, “Baby what do you think I’m good at?”
“You’re good at organizing and communicating and working with people.” He went back to cooking and I went back to thinking. Communicating, I like that. I took to Google and searched “jobs for creative communicators”. Those four words opened an entire world of careers. Bingo.
Rhonda’s Short List of Must Haves
- Must be entertainment or media based. I may not be a traditional working actor but film and television will always be my passion. Plus, I’ve got a working resume of freelance PA gigs so I”m off to a great start.
- Must be creative (a loose term) and have elements of writing. I get bored with jobs that are mundane and require no real creative energy (problem solving, projects, etc.). I love the rush of brainstorming and coming up with ideas.
- I must feel essential to the team I’m sick of the whole worker bee, come in, put your head down and do your job life. I want to be in a place where my thoughts count and I can see how I’m helping things grow.
The parable of the talents is one of many allegories that teaches us ownership. Ownership of our potential and ownership of our success. I want to be unstoppable. To me that means I thrive, I achieve and I live life to the fullest. For some people this doesn’t mean getting a career but ask yourself are there areas where you could be doing more.
My career search is far from finished. I’ve essentially narrowed it down to four fields: PR, advertising, marketing, and casting. And for the first time I’m genuinely excited. Next week, I’ll explore the question: What would you do if you weren’t afraid so stick around.